Imbalance

Assalamualaikum :)
May peace be upon you!
Final exams is nearing the end fuhh..
Have straight 3 papers from 18-20/6 and I am so damn tired.
This time, I dont know why but I feel like there are sooooOOOOoo many challenges.
I have problem with several people and most importantly, I dont have a peaceful heart. To the point that I have to, hmmm... let just say several people knew what I've done and all. I dont know why. Whether it is because of hormonal imbalance or what.

I still dont have a peaceful heart. Even now. Just after maghrib I've read the Quran and there is an ayat about how this life and everything that Allah gives is only for a while,only in this dunya and all the things that we love is not for forever. And the life in hereafter,with Allah is the one that last forever. And I cry. Mainly because I felt like I want to return to Him. I felt like, I really want to be in that good place,with Allah :( but I have sinned so many times. I'm so ashamed to ask even for that very rightful place with Allah. At a point, I feel like many things in life are pointless. Like, shouldnt I just strive for jannah but then yes,you cant achieve the jannah that easy..life is a pathway to jannah. Allah..

I want that rightful place, with Allah. I want all those things that last forever. I think I'm being tested now, whether my heart is strong or not, to face challenges. Most of the problems have been settled alhamdulillah :) but still, I dont feel good. And I keep crying while reading the Quran. I feel so immature lately. Feeling sad over the pettiest things. I dont even care about it before. And I keep getting the feelings that people dont love me, that people are ignoring me and so on. And it makes me sad. And I hate that feelings, it comes with lots of bad thoughts.

Need to grow up faster maybe.