It's Enough To Have...

ALLAH

Yes, it's enough if we have Him, if we remember Him everyday, every seconds of our life.
Because the truth is, He doesnt need us. We are the one who need Him.
And without realizing, we are the one who keep forgetting Him and only find Him whenever we faced a hardtimes. Do we find Him when we are getting something good? Sometimes, we tend to forget. I tend to forget. I tend to forget to say Alhamdullillah when getting something and saying Innalillah when I'm faced with hardships. But in the end, I'm always the one that keep going back to Him, finding Him when I'm troubled. And yes, He is always there :)

Spread your LOVE to Him, the one and only creator, the one who gives us everything we have today.

يَا أَيُّهَا النَّاسُ أَنْتُمُ الْفُقَرَاءُ إِلَى اللَّهِ ۖ وَاللَّهُ هُوَ الْغَنِيُّ الْحَمِيدُ

O men! It is you who stand in need of God, whereas He alone is self-sufficient, the One to whom all praise is due.

35:15

Time...

A precious thing that we always take for granted..
Time,a thing that will never return back.
There were some moment,that I would like to rewind and do it back.
But then I realised, by changing it, I'm changing ME,who I am today.
I'm not hundred percent proud of it.I'm far frim perfect.
But I do knew how to appreciate.
I want to appreciate more.Lova more,forgive more,accept less and give more to others ^__^

Life is DIFFERENT...depends on the way you look at it.

Time When Even Words Are Not Enough

Yes, there will also be a time when someone talkative like me become..lost for words..

Some people said to me:

Even though you faced the same problem like ***,

why you still look ok? Compared to that person who cant focus on anything else.

*smile*

It's not that I'm ok, I'm trying to be OK.

I dont focus on the problem.I'm focusing on getting on with my life.

*sigh* *sigh* *sigh* *sigh*

"There will always be a problem. But as long as you turn back to ALLAH,

everything will be OKAY.

As long as you redha with it.

Everything happened have it's own hikmah.InsyaALLAH"

Post Update Untuk Birthday

Assalamualaikum...
Disebabkan beberapa 'peristiwa' yg berlaku demi nak menyambut birthday aku,aku nak minta maaf kepada semua pihak,kwn2 kesygn aku sebab jadi mcm ni.Alhamdulillah dah settle.Terime kasih utk kwn2 semua,wpun x dpt join smbutan tp msih bagi hadiah.Thanks kwn2 :)

Kepada kwn2 semua,Dayah,Mar,Alia,Jiha,Nabilah,Syera,Radiah,Afi,Teng,Aqilah,Sakinah,Aliyah Awang,thanks banyak2!Korang memang comel dan sweet yer :D

Mane2 salah faham tu,harap lupekan.Ni semua ujian utk mnguji kekuatan ukhuwah kita.Moga persahabatan kita berkekalan,insyaALLAH...

Perangai Manusia Yang Aku Menyampah-Who Are You To Judge?

Assalamualaikum.
Sorry hari ni tiba2 terlebih rajin,update dua kali,xde tujuan pun.Cuma terasa sikit bila melawat blog kawan2 yang lain.Sebab jelas je dorang boleh follow blog lain.Ok,blog aku ni x bermanfaat pun.Aku tulis pasal hidup aku sendiri je.Design pun x lawa.Boring lak tu,xde info.Sebab tu aku x kesah org x follow.Aku just tulis nak luahkan apa dalam hati.Aku pun x prnah prgi blog orang and cakap "i follow u,u follow i balik".Oh,no!Not my style.Tapi nak tau apa buat aku terasa?

Sebab aku tgk blog A.Biasa2 je.Lebih kurang je dengan blog aku.Tapi B,C,D,E,F,G follow and link dekat blog dorang.Aku tau most of my friends x baca pun blog aku.And x link blog aku,x follow.Sebab tu aku bebas cakap cmni.Tapi still thanks to Izzati,my bestfriend yg x prnah jemu bace blog x bermanfaat ni :') serius terharu!

Dalam kalangan kawan2,x kesah dekat Jordan or Malaysia,people are always skeptical about me.Cara pemakaian,pergaulan,percakapan and macam2 lg pasal aku,semua org nk judge.The problem is,aku ni MANUSIA BIASA.Dont expect me to be perfect.It's okay nak tegur tp dont judge me because you dont even know me.Kau tahu ke sejarah hidup aku?Aku dah rasa banyak benda.Aku dah banyak menangis.Pasal org judge2 and tikam belakang ni,aku dah biasa.Dah lali.Tapi aku tetap sedih.Aku punya keyakinan and self-esteem memang LOW GILA.Aku rasa,even sometimes dgn org2 yg rapat dgn aku,yg dorg judge aku.Yang dorang terpaksa berbaik dan kawan dgn aku sebab ksian.Aku memang selalu sangka buruk kat orang.

So please,STOP JUDGING ME!Okay,aku memang x baik,x alim,x perfect,tulis blog pelik mengarut,perasan bagus.Tapi tu semua luaran.Orang macam aku jadi mcm ni sbb org lain jgk.Ada reason kenapa org susah nak rapat dgn aku,rapat thp aku luahkan sgala-galanya.Sebab aku takut dorang akan judge aku.My life is complicated.Almost all part of it.And sometimes,I think my heart are broken.I dont have the strength to face all of these ALONE :(

Kisah Penyakit-Penyakit Aku

Assalamualaikum...

Tajuk tu memang x boleh blah,tulis macam lah selalu sangat sakit,macam sakit kronik pulak.Oh,tak...Taklah sampai ke tahap sakit kronik pun.Tajuk je saje bagi gempak.

Kalau dekat kawan-kawan aku,aku mesti cerita sejarah penyakit-penyakit yang aku pernah kena.Senang cakap,dalam setahun,mesti ada jelah penyakit-penyakit pelik yang aku akan kena.Bermula sejak aku Form 2 lagi.Aku jenis yang jarang sakit macam demam-demam ni.Kalau selsema tu biasa je lah kan.Tapi aku bila sekali sakit,pergi klinik,mesti hampir membawa aku ke hospital (tapi x masuk pun).Paling kurang pun,mesti aku dibekalkan ubat yang sangat banyak untuk beberapa tempoh melebihi dua minggu.Nak tau apa sakit aku pernah kena?Jom...

1.Form 2:

Time ni,ada sekali,aku sampai seminggu x pergi sekolah.Aku pun x tahu apa nama sakit tu tapi senang cakap,dalam seminggu ni aku x boleh makan.Asal makan je muntah.Asal makan je muntah.Minum air macam milo ke pun muntah.Lepas seminggu,dah kurang sikit tapi kena makan ubat tahan muntah sebelum makan apa2.Aku pernah kena benda ni 2 kali seumur hidup,huhu...

2. Form 3:

Perut aku cepat sangat masuk angin.Ada sekali ni time bulan puasa.Memang teruk lah sampai satu tahap perut aku mcm pedih gila asyik rasa macam dicucuk je.Bila check doctor syak kena appendix(betul ke eja?xtau) tp bila check air kncing sume,baru disahkan x kena.Tapi sering kena makan ubat jugak setiap pagi sebab rasa pedih tu berterusan selama sebulan gak la.(pedih tu x sama dgn masuk angin ok)

3.Form 4:

Aku x tau kenapa tapi satu badan aku penuh merah dan ada setengah tempat jadi bintik-bintik benjol hitam.Check doctor,doctor cakap mcm alergik.Doctor bagi ubat,sembuh.Tapi parut hitam tu susah nak hilang.Sedih2.

4.Form 5:

Tahun paling banyak sakit!First,kena satu ketumbuhan pelik kat telinga aku ni.Aku xtau apa bnda sebenarnya.Mula2 aku ingt jerawat kt telinga tu.Telinga kiri.Tapi bila mak aku tgk,dia pelik sebab kaler dia mcm kehitaman.Pergi check doctor kt klinik,dr x tau.Dr suruh check dekat pakar telinga dekat hospital.Dah buat surat semua.Aku patut kena operate.Tiba2 kuasa ALLAH malam tu jugak bnda tu pecah!Ko tau apa jadi(mesti la xtau) berdarah habis,banyak GILA!Cpat2 umi drive ke klinik(sbb dah mlm dan nk cpt,brdarah2 kot) pastu dr check,bersihkan.Berbalut la telinga tu.Memang pedih dan berdenyut2 je rasa.3 hari lepas tu,bukak.Dr bersihkan lagi.Dr pelik sbnrnya sbb nk ckp bisul bkn.Dr takut bnda tu ada balik kt tmpt sama.Smnggu lepas tu,setiap hari dr suruh balut telinga tu.Selalu gk berdarah.Bila dah lgsg x brdarah,dah ok dr bagi dua option.Nak jahit atau biarkan je brcantum sndiri.Sebab telinga aku bahagian tu berlubang!Aku x nmpak pn sbb kt bhagian blkg tlinga tu.Cuak aku dgr tp biar je smpai cntum sndiri.

Nak dekat SPM sakit mata.Lepas SPM,ada satu pnyakit ni.Teruk gk aku kena.Lebih 3 bln baru ok.Mmg trseksa tp aku x nk bg tau sebab malu la,haha.Bnda ni kadang2 kena je.Tapi sabar je la.

SEKARANG

Alhamdulillah,tahun ni x kena apa2.Tapi skrg dah start risau,aku rasa ada something dekat belakang telinga kanan aku.Aku suruh mak aku check.Takut ketumbuhan mcm dulu tu.Mak aku tgk.Memang rupa dia macam dulu.Mak aku suruh prgi klinik.Aku x berani.Ptg td mak aku check lg,dah makin teruk,kehitam-hitaman dah.Adoi...

Moral of the story:

Aku memang selalu sakit.Tapi bagi aku,sakit ni mcm kifarah dosa.Aku manusia biasa.Memang byk je buat silap.So,maybe dgn pnyakit2 ni,trhapus lah dosa aku sdikit sbyk.Aku xtau knapa stiap kali prgi klinik,msti pnyakit pelik2 aku kena.Doakan telinga aku tu ok.Doakan bukan ketumbuhan.Nak xnak,esok lusa kena prgi klinik,before masuk Ramadhan.Takut jugak.Aku rasa maybe this time kena jumpa pakar telinga sebab bnda ni asyik jadi je.Xkan stiap tahun nak berdarah2,buang bnda sama.Hmm..tu je lah.Alhamdulillah,ALLAH bagi kesempatan aku pnjg umur.

Hargai Masa Sihat

Sihat Sebelum Sakit

setiap penyakit ada ubat kecuali...

MATI DAN TUA

Ok,babai...

people are hard to understand,especially your own friends

assalamualaikum....
it's been such a long time since the last time i've updated the blog
very busy with classes,exam,activities and such

before this,i've wrote about how dissapointed i am with one of my friends * now i prefer to consider her just as an acquaintance,not a friend anymore because friend dont ditch you,and lying about it*
sometimes it was really hard to understand your friend.


for example,this one friend of mine.she seems really nice to other and many people like her too
but when there just us,she sort of i dont know,maybe change?sometimes,what she do really hurt my feeling but i just bear with it.when i ask her about something,she answer with harsh tone,like angry tone.and when i do some mistakes,the way she pointed it,really hurt my feeling like 'how come you didnt even know how to do that?' or 'didnt anyone teach you how to do it?your mother didnt teach you?' and sometimes,just because i didnt bother to do something,just because i'm busy with exams or anything,she will said 'you are lazy' or 'i always have to do this,you never bother to do it' when the truth is,i did do it!but of course,there's no need for me to show it in front of her that i've done it.sometimes i didnt understand why she said that kind of hurtful words.she said some insulting things other than that too,but i didnt bother to write it down.and how she keep whining when she have to do or join something -_-

and when i didnt ask her to do it,and then she has to do it,she will be whining,said something bad about me under her breath,muttering about how lazy i am,da da da da.... do it with lots of noise just to annoy the hell out of me and make me realize it,and then when it all finish,just finish it all alone.i dont care that much because i dont ask her to do it and even when she's doing it for herself,just do it quietly and dont bother me ~_~

but yeah,others wont believe it because she didnt show that side to many people.but still,as a friend,i'm grateful that i've knew her,she's a good friend,have taught me lots of things,always pointed out my mistakes,and turn me to a better person.she's the type of friend that i would call 'love to hate'.i like and love her so much,especially when she didnt show other side of her,the dark side i would call it.all in all,people are different and have their own flaws.even me myself have my own flaws that my friends have to deal with.but truthfully,when u want to say something to a person,pointed out their mistake,better said it nicely.and if you dont want to do something,then just dont do it if you just do it to show how angry you are with your friend

being me,when i'm angry with my siblings,i will pointed it out,say it out loud but with friend,i will keep quiet and just forgive them.even if i point it out,i will point it out in my own discreet way so that it wont hurt their feelings because me myself  dont like it when people pointed my mistake with harsh ways.

okay,now i feel better,i'm already forgiving her * like i said before,i love her so much so i wont stay mad at her for long,hehe* and i hope if she read this,just knew that i love her no matter what.i've already considered her as my friend and family but still,sometimes i need to write down about my disappointment and such

sorry for a little harsh words being used there.
huhu.i'm just a mere and normal human beings.i make mistakes
wassalam

bila diri ini terjatuh

salam...sori sebab tajuk kedengaran mcm poyo dan bajet sikit,ala2 macam tjuk novel pun ada tp tu lah kebenarannya,aku x mnipu

sejak dua menjak ni,x dinafikan yg smngt dlm diri sdikit rapuh,x tahu knpa.dan akhirnya gugur juga mutiara pada satu pagi time bercakap dgn umi.haish,mcm kanak2 riang ria ribena je *bukan riang ria raya,raya lmbt lagi! *
tapi sbenarnya,bile dah puas mmbuang segala mutiara yg patut,rasa lega sikit,mcm dah kurg beban di dada.x dinafikan lah,dduk blajar di Jordan ni mmg mncbr,lagi2 utk org macam aku.x prnh brpisah dgn family,x prnh hidup sndiri.and kne blajar dkt Jordan yg guna Bahasa Arab 95 peratus sbgai bhasa perbualan!aku dah lah x mint ARAB!dulu kalau abah suruh prgi belajar negara Arab,mesti aku gelak2,ckp mustahil!aku yg byk kkurangan,x lyk ambil bhagian agama,tu lah yg ada jauh dlm sudut hati aku.rasa diri ni byk dosa,x lyk utk mmbimbing org lain

tetapi,sehebat-hebat perancangan kita,perancangan ALLAH lagi hebat!sape sngke,pergi Jordan pulak aku utk mlnjutkan pljrn,dlm bidg yg lain jgk la dr ape yg aku mint.mule2,hati ni mmbrontak.smpai skrg pun,adakalanya time sush,aku msih persoalkan kputusan aku bljr kt sini,biasalah manusia,time susah baru ingat ALLAH

rasa bersalah sbb aku slalu mrungut,mengatakan diri x mmpu,mnyesal je kerjanya dah smpai sini,pdhl x reti nk brsyukur
rmai org yg nk dtg cni x dpt peluang sama,rmai org x dpt smbung blaja sbb xde duit,aku lak sng2 je smbung blajar,free pulak tu.sometimes,mmg sush nk brsyukur,ckp sng nk buat tu susah

rasa byk sgt khilaf aku ni,dosa lg lah,jgn ckp,astaghfirullahalazim....
rasa bersalah buat umi and abah risau hari tu
rasa bersalah sbb asyk ckp mnyesal dan nk balik msia
rasa bersalah sbb slalu ckp xnk dduk cni lg
rasa bersalah sbb diri aku ni x hbis2 ulang mistake yg sama

please pray the best for me and insyaALLAH,because of ALLAH,i will try my best :)

wassalam...

bila kenangan itu ku jelajahi

salam...

tgk gmbr kt atas,dah boleh mengagak kot sedikit sebanyak ape yg nk ditulis

dah lebih 6 bulan menjejakkan kaki ke bumi Anbiya' Jordan ni,byk bnda aku dah lalui

dari seorang yg x matang macam kanak2 ribena yg x tahu nk goreng jemput2 sampai lah mnjadi org yg bole buat kari,tomyam dan masak utk 30 org!!haish,mantop! *jgn riak,dosa bsr!astaghfirullah halazim~ *

wlaupun mcm tu,stiap hari,rasa rindu pasti hadir dekat insan ni.wajibbul ghunnah!!!stiap kali rasa rindu tu mnjengah,mmg x tahu lah nk mention macam mana

tu lah insan nyer,umi ku!!!!!!!

stgh org pnggil MAK,IBU,MAMA,MUMMY tapi aku panggil UMI

insan ni,mmg aku syg lebih dari nyawa aku sndiri *hiperbola sungguh*

dulu time kanak2,kalau umi cakap pasal mati *cis,nympah ngn tajuk ni*, aku msti ckp, 'umi jgn mati dulu.biar hanum mati dulu xpe.hanum x snggup hidup kalau umi xde'. sgt kanak2 ayat time tu

tapi the truth is,mmg aku x boleh bygkan hidup tnpe umi

dulu duduk rumah dr kecik sampai umur 18.bile trpaksa brpisah jauh,mmg susah

tnpa malu dan segan,aku ngaku la.first two weeks kat Jordan mmg asyik nangis je,rindu kat family lg2 kat umi.tp x prnh mnangis stkt ni time call family.cntrol macho

alhamdulillah,aku brsyukur sbb UMI adalah ibu aku.x akan ada insan yg boleh ganti tmpt umi dalam hati aku *maybe suami lps dah kawen,haha* tapi umi ttp no 1.insan yg jg aku time aku sakit,yg picit kpale,ltk mnyak angin,teman aku prgi tnds mlm2 bute kalau aku sakit prut,ambik aku kt skola time aku trtnggl bas,msk bekal stiap hari dr aku tdika smpai hbis skola mnengah,sokong per je kputusan aku,x mrh pun time aku kluar MRSM,x tnjuk sdih dpn aku wpun ader probs bsr cmner pn,akan mntk tlg dr aku kt dpur klau dah pnt sgt,x prnh gnggu aku blajar,msk mknn fav aku,wish bday aku tiap tahun *xde org lain prnh buat bnde ni lg yer*, x mrh time imtihan Ulum Quran aku dpt sikit,risau and mrh giler klau aku balik lmbt bile kluar ngn kwn2 sbb umi risau *aku tahu sgt* and mcm2 lg la

mane muat aku nk tulis smua jasa dlm 19thn aku idop nih

 hanis,umi,aku!

raye thn lepas,huhu,RINDU!!!

to umi,sorry slalu buat umi risau,marah,frustrated with me

i'm not a good daughter,i knew but i try to get better

so u can be the most proudest person with me

i'm sorry i didnt say it much but i do,LOVE YOU SOOOOOOOOOO MUCH!!

words cant describe it,and i knew u feel the same too :)

umi,thanks for everything!

=D

random thoughts

salam...

sejak akhir2 ni krn x brape sibuk and exam pun x start lg maka kerap lah jugak aku mengupdate dgn tajuk yg super boring ni,'random thoughts'

haha,random la sangat,so nk bace silekan,xnk sudah!

1. time akhir kelas Mathematics for Economics and Business, doctor tibe2 ckp nk buat exam lg 2 minggu!what the papaya!haih,yg doctor ajar pun aku x phm,nk buat exam lak T_T

2. aku x taw knpe tapi aku rase aku cpt lapar la skrg.mcm baru je mkn 15 mnit yg lalu tp tibe2 da lapar balik.padahal aku mkn bace bismillah...pelik....

3. aku trkejut time teman makcik dayah pergi beli weinak td,tibe2 ader org peluk aku dari belakang.

aku baru nk karate ke silat time tu,terkejut bapak tp rupe2 nye rahil.haish,buat trkejut mak je =P

4. aku asyk brsedih 2,3 menjak ni disbbkan 2,3 bnde yg x dpt dielakkan.jd aku ngn rahil buat la sesi berpelukan kt bwh trowong tu smbil aku cite sikit2 probs yg mlanda.lawak weyh,buat drama swasta lak kt ctu

5. masih knpius nk balik msia bper lme and nk gune pnrbangan per,ish,mls r pikir bnde2 cmni sbnrnyer tp kne pikir gk @_@

6. serius aku da xtaw nk tulis per.baik aku wassalam b4 trus mngarut =D

salam maulidur rasul

salam...

alhamdulillah,dapat lagi kita bangun dan menghirup udara hari ini

tetapi trnyata ramai antara kita terlupa dgn satu nikmat ni,nikmat dapat bangun tidur.bkn nikmat tidur je yg kita patut hargai tapi nikmat dapat bangun dan diberi peluang oleh ALLAH utk menikmati satu lg hari atas muka bumi ni pun sepatutnya kita hargai

*ceh,padahal aku pun jrg hargai,xpe2,muhasabah diri =) *

hari ni tepat 12 Rabiulawal,satu tarikh hijriah yg wajib semua umat Islam ingat

kalau x ingat,x tahu nk cakap apa sebab hari ni lah,kita semua dapat menikmati nikmat Islam,berada di bawah satu lembayung rahmat dan nikmat agama yg benar,alhamdulillah...

tu lah tarikh kelahiran kekasih ALLAH,Rasulullah...

hari di mana penuh rahmat dan nikmat

adakalanya bila teringat sejarah perjuangan Rasulullah,terasa diri aku ni kerdil sangat

Rasulullah yg x prnh brputus asa dlm menyampaikan dakwah walau menghadapi banyak dugaan dan cabaran,tentangan,ancaman bunuh dan sbgnya

tetapi aku ni,baru ada cabaran dlm pelajaran sikit,cabaran dalam hidup sikit dah rasa nk brputus asa

nk give up,down,sedih,menangis dan semua yg sewaktu dengannya

jadi bersmpena hari yg AGAK SUPER SPECIAL mulia ni,aku nk ajak diri aku dan semua orang utk muhasabah balik diri kita

kita ckp kita CINTA,SAYANG dan RINDU pada Rasulullah tp kita ikut ke sunnah dan semua ajaran Rasulullah?? aku pun sama lah,pndai ckp tp x pndai buat =__='

tp dah name kita pun manusia,perlu sntiasa diberi peringatan

so,aku harap lepas ni,kita semua lebih rajin muhasabah diri

bandingkan kehidupan kita dengan Rasulullah,insyaALLAH...

wassalam....

words that really hurts my heart

salam...okay,i dont know why but i kept repeating my title using the word 'words'

haha,it seems like there are no other word existed,okay,another 'word' there.point taken

*that means your vocabulary is low,dush*

actually,this was supposed to be a kinda sad post but because of my ramblings up there,it turn out kinda funny??? 0_o 

lately,i really meant to write about this thing but didnt have the gut/time/heart to do so but i thing i need to write it up because sometimes it's driving me crazy

but i'm feeling guilty because it's like talking bad about your friend

okay,secret reveal,i'm going to talk about my friend

i do love this one particular friends,i REALLY REALLY DO LOVE HER *write in capital to make it sound more realistic*

it's just that....i dont like the way she talk to me.full stop

i dont like it because the way she talk sometimes really hurt my feeling.it didnt happened all the time,sometimes only but the sometimes things is hurting my feeling more and more from day to day

i'm not perfect so maybe i also hurt her feelings sometimes

but sometimes i realized that all people have also start realizing about it

and there is also a particular sentence that she said that really hurt my heart *and make me cry,more than once 0_o i know,i'm GEDIK*

and sometimes,she cut down when i said or dont want to accept my opinion or sometimes her sentences are belittling my ability or knowledge about something

and she makes me look like the bad person =_='

okay,i really am not a good person but sometimes the judging eyes of people hurt my feeling more

haish,people who knows me for long knew that i dont tell that person if she/he hurt my feeling

that is me.and i'm sensitive with word.u can hit me with your hand but if u hit me with your words,it will be harder to forget

hmmm....no matter what,i still love this particular friend,when she dont treat me like that

and i forgive all things she did that hurt my feeling.forgive and forget...

hah,after writing it down,i feel better.no hard feeling after all so after this,i wont think about this matter anymore.maybe just talk to my bestfriend to share about it but that's all,nothing else =D

nothing else to say,wassalam....

words dont come out but the heart does feel...

salam...
the second week of second sem has passed by,okay so far
so far so good,yeah,kinda but urghh,i dont like the fact that there is new building for Economic Faculty,so far away and on Monday and Wednesday,i have a class at Syariah Faculty straight after class at the so-called new Economic building
so after my Mathematical Economics class,i run like crazy to my next class and i arrived at the next class looking like crazy people *haha,my opinion only,other people dont even realize*

lately,i dont know why but my spirit is kinda down
i meant,i was always,i repeat,ALWAYS thinking about going back to Malaysia and just continue my study there.heh,silly thinking right?i was skyping*oho,skyping,new English term 0_o * with my mum and was telling her, 'i wanna go back,i dont like it here.if only i know,i would just continue my study in Malaysia* and my mum just keep silent and try to lift my spirit
i think i was being like GEDIK, i dont meant a thing that i said
i like Jordan,i do LIKE it.maybe because i'm not feeling well,and when u are far away from family,u are feeling like that
i'm afraid i'm making my mum worry with my constant whining =__='

yeah,on the outside,i seem strong but there is so many days and time when i feel like just giving up
stop doing what i'm doing now
sometimes i feel like screaming but in the end,i still move on
because i have faith,i have ISLAM,i have ALLAH and i have all people that love me by my side,always supporting me,alhamdulillah...

so,till we meet again!
wassalam....

despicable me,urghh =_='

salam..

why the title is like that?it's because its true,i'm despicable and sometimes i even despise myself =='

wanna know why?it's because i keep on repeating the same old mistake

i'm feeling guilty to all people around me sometimes because all the sins that i've done

i really hope i would change for better

i dont want to continue being like this

sometimes,we dont even realize about the sins that we do because it was part of our routined life

bad right?sometimes,people around us all do it so we didnt realize that it was a sins

like our aurat,how we interact with the opposite gender,our attitude with parents,family and friends

i've done so many mistake and if only i could revert it all ='(

everyone do mistake but things became worse if we keep repeating it

sadly,i always do that

i pray that ALLAH will give me strength to change,to become a better person in everything that i do

insyaALLAH

penat r camni

salam...

taw x aku penat ngn ape?penat nk jg hati org

but in the end,xde yg jg hati aku pun

i do appreciate my friends tp sometimes,they are just asking to much from me

and sometimes,aku rase brsalah sbb always buat kwn aku trasa

and aku x taw dorg trasa

and then aku rasa bersalah

and aku x suke

and then jd cmni

and aku rasa nk balik je malaysia

and just say bye2 je la kt korg

ps:this thing is making me homesick,AGAIN!!!

sory,this time byk prkataan 'and' dan 'rasa'

the ordinary me

salam....

the title....ermm,sometimes i dont know why,the title of my post are sort of the same.LAME ~_~

before this,there is post with title the unforgettable me etc etc

annoying la!why cant i came up with an interesting title like....ok,i dont know...if i know i wont came up with a LAME title,duh!

sorry,i think i keep babbling about myself non-stop and i dont know why.people will get boring

but still,this is my blog,the place for me to talk.why i choose that title????it's more because it's really who i am,without lying,i'm just ORDINARY.ordinary like the girl next door type

i'm not beautiful or clever.i dont have the angel-like solehah type of personality

my face is not fair clear skin type like snow white.i even have scars from pimples and acne

if u look at my face upclose,it was like the surface of moon,really,i'm not lying

pimples and acne really affect me alot,during high school and middle school because i've them for like FOREVER!it destroys my confidence.i always feel like i'm UGLY.i feel like people be friends with me because of pity.i never told anyone bout this but that's really how i feel.when i'm with my friends,i feel ashamed of myself,so many times even up until now.

i'm not skinny nor tall.i'm just 160cm in height and 5xkg in weight

my voice is not sweet,many people say bad things about my voice

like 'u're voice like a guy' or 'my ears feels hurt just by listening to your voice' and 'cant you keep your voice down?why are you always so noisy'

but the fact is,my voice is like that since i was born.not like i'm faking it.all the comments are hurtful and stayed with me until now.VOICE and ACNE are two things that i'm really sensitive about and can hurt me easily

people forget me easily because i'm really ordinary and boring.i'm not that cheerful and happy-go-lucky type of person.i take longer times to warm up to people and after peoples know me better,they are sometimes surprise with me because they expect me to be the nerdy,geeky,quiet type of person but really,big NO.i'm just SHY.that's all

other than that,people ALWAYS,i repeat,always JUDGE me before they even know me

like saying,i'm loud,lazy,dont cooperate and such when they dont even know me

i feel like smacking down all of them,huh!

so what if i'm NOT BEAUTIFUL,NOT CLEVER,NOT SKINNY,DONT HAVE SWEET VOICE,NOT A DAUGHTER TO SOMEONE RICH,DONT EVEN HAVE CONFIDENCE IN MYSELF???

it's people around me that make me like this

but thanks to ALLAH,there are still lots of people who accept me the way i am

my UMI,ABAH,SIBLINGS,KAKTI,HARIZ,HAFIY,HIDAYAH,IZZATI,HANI,RAHIL,SARAH,PAU,HALIMAH,

NABIHAH,ALIA,FATIN,MARDIANASYAKIRAH,ARIF,NASRULLAH,PIJAN and some other more.thanks so much! i really do LOVE you guys so much <3

pissed off =='

salam...

*ok,i still didnt forget to give my salam even though i'm totally pissed off right now*

sorry,i didnt mean to make a big fuse about what i'm feeling because it's not like anyone would care right but it's just that...i dont know.i have a really nagging pissed off feeling today,since afternoon.

ok,to be honest,i do know the reason why i'm feeling like this but cant write it down

many peoples have started reading my blog and some things are better left unsaid especially here*ahem*

i'm pissed off with so many things,like the fact that our hostel's internet is so damn slow*ok,sorry,bad word there* and urghh,i dont know,maybe everything in between

sorry,just this morning i post about being grateful and such and truth is,i really am GRATEFUL

it's just that,i'm a human,there are times when i'm angry,pissed off,bad mood etc etc...

but dont worry,i dont even show my mood in front of my friends.nobody know except me ;)

ok,feeling better now.writing our feeling is a very good theraphy :D

ps:maybe i will go to JUST tomorrow.but wanna ask more people to join me.Yarmouk's students to be precise.hmmm....wanna go or not???

good memoriessss...

salam...

ok guys,today,i've decided to update my blog in english.haha.why??hmmm...

i just want to improved my english communication and writing skills.it's been like FOREVER since the last time i use english =_=' but i dont have any choice because the language that we use in classes and lectures at yarmouk university are in Arabic and i feel like my English are starting to get a bit rusted lately...

*sory for any grammatical or spelling mistakes.like i've said before,i dont use English that much like before.urgh...sad =( *

ok,enough with the introduction or prologue up there.read the title for my entry this time.

GOOD MEMORIES

haha,sounds like good enough for me.it's just a random title.sometimes i dont know what title to use so i just put anything that come into my mind.as simple as that ^__^

i'm in holiday mood right now.just dozing off,online facebook,reading blogs,novels and wandering at streets are my job right now.and sometimes i spend times sleeping at my friends's hostel.most of us are living at different hostel.sometimes i missed my other friends sooo much and i spend a night at their place.you know,do some boring girly things like watching malay dramas together from youtube -done this with syahirah soaib,watching HANI*, go out at night to a shopping mall,playing games and shopping together =) *done these with nabilah,syahirah,mardiana,rahil,aqilah,radiah and etc* and then at night,sleeping together in one small bed and talking non-stop before sleep*done this with mardiana,have a really good time.we just talked and talked until both of us fall asleep.cute right???hehe*,then wandering around Irbid with Alia and Fatin,looking for text book for new sem.oh my god,i really love these peoples so much!they really make my day :D

it seems like i'm in a good mood right?not much actually but still,i'm happy enough ^^

i want to be more grateful with things i have and stop complaining about things i dont have

u'll feel better,really,just try it ok ~

i should stop now or i'll start my ramblings and babbles again,teehee

wassalam.....

posto posto,from malaysia with love =)

salam...pg tadi,seperti yg dibg tahu,aku pergi Barid ambk parcel yg my darling mummy hantar

bler smpai bilik je,mmg x sbr2,ambik2 gmbr and then tros koyak bngkusan tu

alhamdulillah,umi send kan 2 psg bju krung,shelai jubah and satu t-shirt labuh utk aku =)

umi send kan skali beg sandang F.Timber yg abah blanje hari tu

thanks so much umi!

love you soooo much!!

bile tgk bngkusan2 ni,tringt kt family

rindu sgt2 and banget2 kt family

td bru pas call umi,ckp ngn umi ngn abah

disbbkan before this lbih kurg 2 minggu x call,this time call duration mncecah stgh jam

habis weinak*ring ring card versi jordan*

nk buat cmner,nk skype x boleh sbb intrnet lmbab so call je lah sbg pngubat rindu

bile tgk brg2 nih,rase mcm my family ader dpn mate je

diam x diam,da nk dkt 4 bln brada kt jordan

cpt je mase brlalu,mule2 mmg sush,homesick bagai tp lame2,alhamdulillah,brtmbh mudah

 

parcel from msia!

 

 patung kuceng!haha,hadiah from my siblings to me

for my birthday in the late october :D

thanks guys

luv u guys ketat2

 

 comel x?mcm my cat,snowbell,rindu kt my kitty tu

huhu....

sekian shj khabar posto dr msia

sory pics kualiti hodoh

haha

wassalam.......